Think.Think.Think.Think.
What are you thinking about as you read this sentence, GO, I dare you to search your own mind. What's really going on in there?
I recently looked into what I thought about myself. It turns out not very much. It's part of a Bible reading plan I'm doing, fining my own worth. Since Romania, I have gained weight and that I am not comfortable with, I have never been comfortable with gaining weight even if it seems healthy. This is what I'm reminded of every day, I look in the mirror and I see what I've done to myself. "Get yourself back." That's what my head is saying. My heart is saying, "Charlotte, God loves you no matter what. You know this so stop saying these things to yourself and see that you have worth." Apparently my heart can be right sometimes.
Many thoughts go through our heads each day. What is your dominant thought? Is it money? Sex? God? Your partner? I don't know what you're thinking but I'm asking you, if you dare, search yourself. You'll find some really interesting, maybe encouraging, maybe discouraging stuff. You'll see things you won't see unless you really, really search. Become friends within yourself, you'll see where you need to improve, where you need to find confidence, where you is really you.
I'm working on it. I'm really working on it. I've discovered that I want to be toned, not skinny. Healthy looking, not like I have an eating disorder. People always used to remark on how skinny I was. My dance teacher told me I was too skinny once. I never gained weight. Now I have and I don't know how to deal with it but I am and I know God loves me just as I am.
I guess my message is that God loves you no matter what your head is filled with. You just need to search your heart and find if you have captured God's heart in your thoughts, if not then maybe that's something that needs work. Just my opinion.
Many night time thoughts,
Charlotte x
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